


Egged

by a_very_smol_frog



Series: The Crow's Nest [8]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Cheating, Cool Uncles, Crying, Eggs, Fluff and Crack, For once Oikawa is the responsible one, Light Angst, M/M, Papa Bear Iwa, petty revenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:08:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25793389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_very_smol_frog/pseuds/a_very_smol_frog
Summary: Rini’s boyfriend cheats on her. Iwaizumi decides that she deserves a little revenge.~This is part of the Crow’s Nest AU and is not a stand alone fic. I suggest reading Student of the Sun before reading this.~
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Series: The Crow's Nest [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1711909
Comments: 12
Kudos: 185





	Egged

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Thank you so much to everyone who commented on my Writing Prompt/Ideas post! It really helped. 
> 
> Once again Euru5atori helped me with the idea for this fic so thank you!! I had so much fun writing this.
> 
> Also you may notice I refer to IwaOi’s son in this fic. I’m going to write a fic about them adopting him but I had a lot of inspiration for this idea. Following the timeline in my head they would have adopted their child by the time this fic happened. I didn’t want to write this and not mention anything about their son and then write something later that would have shown that they had a kid in this fic. 
> 
> I’m sure it’s not a big deal but I’m a stickler for continuity and details so it would have driven me crazy. Honestly, I hate writing them out of order like this but I loved this fic idea and really wanted to write. 
> 
> So spoilers you will be getting an IwaOi parent fic in the future.
> 
> Anyways I hope you enjoy this silly one shot! I really enjoyed writing it.

If anyone asked Oikawa why he chose Kyoto to open his second bed and breakfast, he would tell them about how he loved the rich culture and history of the area, the beautiful mountains, and the breathtaking views of the sea. It was 100% not because Rini had mentioned going to college in Kyoto since the beginning of highschool. 

He didn’t get cold sweats when thinking about her being over 9 hours away from home, **_alone_ **. No, Kyoto was a good tourist destination with lots of potential for a thriving business. Being a 10 minute bus ride from Rini’s dorm and having her over every Sunday for dinner was an added bonus. 

The brunette lounged on his sofa, lazily flipping through the TV channels but nothing peaked his interest enough to make him pause. He could hear the shower running and could just barely make out Iwa’s soft humming under the sound of the water. 

Hikaru was spending the night at a friend’s house for a birthday party. There was an unusual peacefulness in the apartment without the boisterous 8 year old running around. 

Oikawa paused his search for entertainment when he heard his phone vibrating against the coffee table. A picture of a cute little toddler dressed in a bunny costume lit up his screen. The man smiled fondly at the picture, it felt like he had taken that photo a lifetime ago. 

“Hello Bunny-chan~!” He sang happily into the receiver. His face fell when he heard a sniffle on the other side. 

“U-uncle Tooru. C-can I come over?” The young woman whimpered into the phone. Oikawa felt his blood run cold. 

“Rini what’s wrong? Are you safe? Where are you? I’ll come get you.” The flurry of questions left his mouth without pause. He quickly got up from the couch and began to collect his keys and wallet. 

“No no Uncle Tooru I’m fine! I mean I’m safe and just at my dorm. I can take the bus...I just...I need…I want to be there right now...” Oikawa sagged against the kitchen counter with relief when he heard she was safe. Even though it had been over a decade since that terrible night, he still felt himself slip into panic whenever he thought about the girl getting hurt. 

“Bunny you’re always welcome here no questions asked. Are you sure you don’t want me to come get you?” 

“Yes Uncle Tooru I’m sure. I’ll be there in 15 minutes. Love you.”

“Love you too Bunny.” After the other end of the line went silent, Oikawa allowed himself a few moments to calm his racing heart before he snapped into action. First, he snatched the kettle off the stove and filled it before setting it back down to heat up. Then, he went to find his partner. 

The shower had been turned off but Iwaizumi was still in the bathroom, towel hung loosely on his hips as he stood at the sink brushing his teeth. Forest green eyes looked at Oikawa in the mirror and an easy smile fell onto Iwaizumi’s lips. In any other moment the picture in front of him would have made Oikawa ache in a way that only breathy kisses and bruised hips could soothe, but right now he had other things to focus on. 

“Bunny is coming over.” Iwaizumi raised an eyebrow. The young woman coming over to their home was nothing new and the other man enjoyed her company just as much as her uncle. 

“She was crying.” This statement caused a few emotions to wash over Iwaizumi’s face. The first was fear but this quickly gave way to a steely hardness that Oikawa was never able to name until they had adopted their own child. This was (What Oikawa had so lovingly dubbed and Iwaizumi begrudgingly acknowledged) Iwaizumi’s Papa Bear face. 

The shorter man was quick to rinse out his mouth and put his tooth brush aside. 

“Is she okay? Do we need to go get her? Should I call Tobio?” Much like Oikawa, while he was asking his questions he began to get ready, not willing to waste a single moment being still when Rini might need their help. 

“She’s safe and already on her way here. She was at her dorm when she called.” This caused a little bit of tension to bleed out of Iwaizumi’s shoulders. He traded the jeans he had pulled out of his drawer for a pair of sweatpants instead. 

“Did she elaborate on why she was crying?” Oikawa shook his head. 

“No. She just said she needed us.” Even though he knew his god-daughter was physically safe, an uneasy jitteriness crawled underneath Oikawa’s skin. 

Rini had always been a good kid. Sure she got bad grades sometimes, threw hissy fits, and slacked off on her chores, but she was human. For the most part the girl did everything with a smile and had an air about her that could melt even the coldest of hearts. You couldn’t help but love her. 

The worst thing she had ever done was ditch school one day to go to a water park her last year of highschool. Oikawa trusted her, he knew she would never go out of her way to hurt someone or do something dishonest, but he could stop the millions of worst case scenarios running through his head. Two warm hands on his cheeks pulled him out of his panic. 

“You’re spiraling. Relax. Let’s go wait for her in the kitchen.”

The men moved to the kitchen where the kettle was angrily screeching at them for leaving it for so long. By the time Oikawa had made three cups of tea, the front door opened and softly clicked closed. 

Rini greeted them in the doorway of the kitchen. Dark blue eyes were red rimmed and swollen. She sniffled pitifully as she stared down at her pale blue slippers. When she finally looked up at them they could see her fighting the inevitable. Her bottom lip began to wobble before finally giving way to a sob. Oikawa rushed forward and gathered his god-daughter into his arms. Her hands clung to the back of his shirt with white knuckles. 

“Bunny. Hey Bunny talk to us. What’s wrong?” Oikawa was drowning in worry as he held the sobbing girl. 

“Whatever it is, we will help you fix it okay? Just talk to us.” 

“You can’t fix it!” Rini wailed. Oikawa gently pulled her over to the kitchen table and helped her sit in one of the wooden chairs. He sunk down into a chair next to her and slid the cup of tea into her trembling hands. 

“Rini whatever it is. You can tell us.” Iwaizumi reached out to rub the girl’s arm. She cried softly for a few minutes before finally looking up at the two men. 

“It...Haiji-kun…he…HE CHEATED ON ME!” Rini sobbed, pillowing her head in her arms as grief overtook her once again. 

Oikawa paused. All of this...was because of a _boy_? Instantly he felt relief. Rini wasn’t in any kind of trouble. All of the anxiety that had been sitting so heavily in his chest melted away. He almost wanted to smile with how happy he was, it was just some stupid boy, but the crying figure in front of him kept his lips pulled into a frown.

“Oh Bunny.” The brunette soothingly rubbed his god-daughter’s back. Each cry made his heart sink. He hated to see her so upset. 

“Bunny I’m so sorry. Boys are stupid and he is selfish for hurting you this way.” Oikawa didn’t have much experience in dating outside of his relationship with Iwaizumi, so he was having trouble coming up with the words to comfort Rini. He knew nothing he could say would ease her pain. 

“Do you know where he lives?” It was Iwaizumi’s voice that gathered their attention. Oikawa tried to read his husband’s expression but emerald eyes were cold and his lips were pulled into a hard line. 

“Y-yes?” Rini answered tentatively. 

“Ok tell me where? He’s over 18 right? I don’t want to get in trouble for punching a minor.” The man stood from the table with ease, like he hadn’t just declared he was going to jump Rini’s ex-boyfriend. 

“Iwa you can’t beat him up!” The girl yelled in shock. Iwaizumi’s eyes lazily slid over to look at her. His shoulders were relaxed but thrown back, he looked tall and strong and _dangerous._ Oikawa felt something stir inside of him that he would most definitely have to visit again later. 

“Why not? He hurt you, the jackass has it coming.” 

“Hajime she’s right. You’re almost 40 years old, you can’t go around punching people.” Iwaizumi huffed and rolled his eyes at his husband. He turned and opened the refrigerator. 

“Fine. How about we just egg his car?” The man turned back around with a carton of eggs in hand and a wicked smile on his lips.

~~~

“I can’t believe we’re actually doing this.” Rini whispered for the 20th time since they got out of Oikawa’s car. The winter air was crisp and the cold wind shoved everyone into their houses to huddle against their heaters. The darkened streets were silent, only the soft hum of the street lamps filling the air. 

On his arm Oikawa had a bag filled with eggs, a can of whipped cream, some cans of anchovies, and a take out container that had been hidden in the back of their fridge since the dawn of time. 

He found himself agreeing with his god-daughter. What they were doing was childish and immature. They were business owners, fathers, and had crossed the line into middle aged. This kind of revenge was beneath them, but he found himself exhilarated at the same time. 

The trio quickly walked down the darkened street and towards their victim. 

“Is that it?” Iwaizumi pointed to a small red hatchback parked on the side of the road. One tire was perched on the curb and the front bumper was covered in scratches and dents. Clearly, this man took as good of care of his car as he did his relationships. What was Rini doing with this loser in the first place?

“Y-yes that’s it…Iwa are you sure we should do this? What if we get in trouble?” Rini hesitantly looked around them. How Oikawa had ever thought that she had done something wrong was beyond him. 

“All the lights in the house are off and no one is on the street. We’re just cracking a few eggs on his car. Don’t you want to get some payback?” 

The young woman stopped in front of the car and stared at it with a hardened glare. The two men stood and watched her, waiting for her final decision. In the end this was for her, and if she really was against it then they would leave. 

After a few moments she turned and looked at them, trusting out one of her hands. 

“Hand me the eggs Uncle Tooru.” Iwaizumi’s face broke out into a wide smile. Oikawa rolled his eyes. Their friends always teased _him_ for being the dramatic one, but here Iwaizumi was encouraging his god-daughter to vandalize a car. 

The shorter man excitedly took the can of whipped cream from Tooru. 

“Let’s do this.” 

~~~

30 minutes later they all stood back and admired their masterpiece. Whipped cream covered all of the door handles and the windshield wipers. Raw egg was smeared on the windows and the hood of the car. They had smeared the leftovers (which resembled what might have been some kind of dumpling in the past) onto the roof, and then emptied the cans of fish into the small compartment that hid the gas cap. 

It was disgusting, it smelled, and it would be a nightmare to clean up. 

“This is perfect.” Rini said breathlessly. The entire time she hadn’t been able to stop giggling. 

“Good. He deserved it. Now let’s go home and shower. We all fucking reek.” Iwaizumi said, giving the girl a soft smile. 

Rini beamed at them, all traces of her sadness gone. Their actions most definitely fell into the morally gray spectrum, but to see her smile like that made it all worth it. 

~~~

After they had gotten home and cleaned up, the trio sat on the couch together, tea in hand and a movie on the TV. Rini sat in the middle, her head pillowed on Oikawa’s shoulder as they watched the climax of the movie. The main character was storming into a chapel, interrupting the wedding of the love of his life to confess to her after foolishly telling her he hated her because he thought it would be better for her to be with someone else. 

“Boys are so stupid. I’m only dating girls from now on.” Iwaizumi let out a snort. 

“Girls can be stupid too. Just take your time to find someone who's good for you. It took me 27 years to find Trashykawa.” Oikawa wrinkled his nose at the childish nickname. 

“And look I gave you years of happiness, a successful business, a happy child, and the opportunity to be blessed with my charm and good looks every day. You should be thanking me.” 

Rini laughed at her uncle’s bickering. 

“Iwa what would you do if Hikaru-kun cheated on a girl?” The man took a few moments to ponder the question. Oikawa turned his head, interested to hear how his husband would respond to their son’s hypothetical actions. 

“The same thing we did tonight probably. Or make him do something absurd like fill the bathtub with a thimble.”

Oikawa let out an exasperated sigh. No one was _ever_ allowed to call him the dramatic one again. 

**Author's Note:**

> If you have any ideas for one shots/stories you’d like me to write please go comment on my other post! It doesn’t have to be for this universe either. I’ve got a few longer fics I’m working on/planning right now but I always love to hear your ideas! 💕


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